Article as printed in The Rochester Post

Physical therapist turned author

June 5, 2008

ROCHESTER - Rochester resident Eric Tomei, 32, is a physical therapist turned author after penning a book about losing his father to heart disease in January 2006.Initially, Tomei admits, he wanted to write a book to constructively deal with his feelings, but the book, "I Miss My Dad," turned into something more.

It was a way for the world to learn how great a person his father was and for readers to understand the consequences of heart disease, which is a nearly silent killer, Tomei said.

"My father died of a heart attack. Of course, later we learned it was a result of heart disease, but he never knew that," Tomei said.

"It was definitely a shock, because he seemed very healthy on the outside."

According to the American Heart Association, heart disease has become America's number one killer, claiming more than 2,500 lives each day. Almost 6 million hospitalizations occur each year due to cardiovascular disease.

When Tomei's father passed away at the age of 57, he was the model of good health. The engineer, who lived in Plymouth, never had any health problems and was 6 feet tall, 170 pounds, Tomei said.

Heart disease can affect anyone, Tomei added, and that's something people should sit up and take notice of.

Tomei said he wanted to keep his father's name anonymous to help readers relate to the story.

"I really think it was an opportunity to share an important part of my life with the rest of the world, which was my dad," Tomei said. "He influenced my life and was so positive. I want people to know how great of a guy he was."

"I Miss My Dad" was Tomei's attempt at reaching readers and connecting through emotion.

He hopes the book will serve as an example for others to express their grief in a healing manner, and help people recognize the fact that loved ones are not around forever. It's important to strengthen those relationships when you can, Tomei said.

"If you have a good relationship with your dad, hopefully you can make it great. If you have an OK relationship with your dad, maybe you can make it good, and if you have a bad relationship with your dad, hopefully you can make it OK," Tomei said. "I want people to connect with their dads on a more personal level because you never know when that person may be taken away."

Tomei's sister, Melissa Shalhoub, said that while the book was a good one, it took her a few days to completely absorb, because it was very emotional. Shalhoub, of Livonia, said Tomei's message is a good one - take advantage of the time you have with your loved ones.

"When you're robbed of a loved one like we were, you don't have time to say goodbye," Shalhoub said. "You have to live in the moment every day and don't hold back anything. You need to make the most of your relationship as we found out, because it can end very quickly."

Fifteen percent of every book sale will go toward Habitat for Humanity, a charity that was close to his father's heart. Tomei's goal is to raise more than $1 million by Dec. 31.

Eventually, Tomei hopes to write other books, but for the time being he has one goal in mind: to reach his fundraising goal.

Currently, "I Miss My Dad." is available for $15 through Flagstone Circle Publishing. Fifteen percent, or $2.25, of every book sale will be donated to Habitat for Humanity. For more information of to purchase the book, visit www.lostdadsclub.com.